life

After losin such a close person , a person i treated like my mum . I was like her daughter too after she lost her own . It realli make me wake up to a lot of things . Life and death is very sudden , aunty did not even know that she would go off . We were laughin just a week ago .

The most horrible momemnt is seeing the blood pressure figure slowly goin down . And the figure on top of the machine had 0. I realli wanted to throw a chair at the machine . When the doc said that there is onli 2 hrs left , i was prayin so hard for a miracle. WHY WHY WHY was all in my head . When blood flowed from the mouth , it was so scary . God realli will just take us when our time is up . They way of livin life is so impt , on ur death bed what are the things you are able to reflect or feel satisfied that u have done .

I dun wanna remember how many clubs i went to , i dun wanna remember which pub i have not visited , which cocktail i have not tried , which guy i did not kiss , how many guys i were crazy over , how many ppl i have in friendster .

What is important is the time u enjoyed your life with your loved ones, enjoyin life alone is seriously not enough. After losin someone so dear, i realli which to hug all the people i loved so dearly and not allow god to take them away from me . So , what is most important to me now is takin care and spending time with the people i love . So that even if i die the next min , they will have memories with me , and i will have memories to bring to heaven .

 

Jesus , after seeing mummy so hysterical , i know that if i die earlier than her , she won't be able to take it . Of course , if mummy leaves me i will be hysterical too , but i realli dun wanna see my mum like that when i die . So if you actually want me to die before mummy , can pls make her strong . I promise you i will live my life properly from now on . Pls also give me the courage to do so . I love you . Oh , pls take care of jie jie and aunty for me ok !  See you .